So Glad I have to listen to THAT! Disgusting!

"Ewwww, I'm so glad I don't have to see the two girls [kissing in the hallways]. That's so disgusting!"
--- a blonde, 30-something female teacher. Oh, to be a Floridian. Poor girls. My heart breaks for them.

Doopa Dee Doo

"I don't know what it should be about because that's too hard, but it should be something about Oompa Loompas."

Pass to skip school

"Just write me a pass saying I'm allowed to come work in here. I promise I won't come in here. But you know that mean sub? I got a referral from her for talking back. You think I'm not gunna treat people the way they treat me? "

[teacher speak inserted here]

"Yeah, I know I escalate it but that won't happen if you write me the pass."

With great attention to detail

"How am I supposed to do this? I don't know what this is supposed to mean that I'm supposed to draw a visualization of the vocabulary word. All of mine are medical terms. You can't draw a colonoscopy!"

What are your interests?

When asked to shout out what possible topics they'd be most interested in exploring for their research papers, I got the following potpourri:

drugs
hippies
emo
cheerleaders
cars and the junkyard
martial arts
sex
parties
alcohol
livestock auctions

Bling hides my insecurities

"A lot of the time, people you think are really rich aren't that rich."

Family Traditions

"What are you doing next year?"

"I'm going to get pregnant next year."

"Why?"

"Following in family tradition."